Back 6 years later.

Calling out to the ether!!!
I am back after 6 years- a few moves, states, relationships and careers later.

Greeting from the Gulf of Mexico! Now how I got here is quite the story (for me at least), but more on that later.

For now, gender roles...

How do we define them, Societally? Socially? Occupationally? Familial? Personally?
And if we chose, or are made to chose any or all of these definitions, how do we integrate them, or seamlessly slide from one to another in our day to day lives? Or do we stand apart, make our own definition and simultaneously outcast ourselves from each and every facet of our day to day lives.

Now as an independent 30 something-ish female I would love to climb on my soap box and preach we can all forge our own path... However I believe it is a bit more complicated than that. Let's explore:

Each and every one of us can find ourselves defining each of these classifications differently, in terms of importance (or rank if you will) as well as where we fall within each. Let's face it we all have different social circles, families, jobs and relationships. With each of these important components of our lives do we not want to feel comfortable, at peace, and free to express ourselves?

Now for many these are not questions that come up, or are even worth pondering on a daily basis... or ever. However I find myself in a gender biased world everyday.  Maybe it is because I live in the south but hail from the North, or because I work in a male dominated field, I realize these are all choices I have made for myself, but I still struggle to meld each part of my life into one. I mean come on- do we not dress, speak, act and present ourselves even slightly differently in different circumstances?

If you find yourself in a place where you can speak to your boss the same way you speak to your friends, or wear PJs to a fancy dinner and work clothes to bed...than... good for you!!! seriously.

However I wear steel toes and hard hat to work, nice clothes out, and would never dream of speaking to my family the way my co-workers and I speak to each other.

Alright I got a bit off topic, but it should all come together (here is to hoping.) How can I be a wife, and hopefully a mother one day, when surely that means the end of a career I do enjoy? How can I not resent one aspect of my life when it surely means completely giving up another? I always believed "I CAN have it all!" and now i am finding, simply because of gender roles, and of course basic anatomy, than I indeed can not.

To come full circle, taking into account every segment that makes up our definition of our gender identity, is it possible to remove the partitions and produce a finished copy (ever up for revision) without sacrifice or resentment?

Perhaps, a question that may never be answered, does not mean it should never be asked.